Sunday, June 24, 2012

Really Don't Know What to Say

Isn't it funny how one minute everything is just so awesome and the next it feels like everything comes crashing down?  You're flying high and then your engines go out.  Boom.  Down you go.  And what can you do about it?  Nothing really.  Sure, you can TRY and aim for a body of water to land in, but you might not be able to make it.  Whatever.  I just hate people.  They have no clue what they want, at all, ever.  And I can admit that when it comes to the mundane, ordinary, every day stuff I'm as indecisive as they come.  But when you ask me about the big picture, what I want out of life, where I want to be in x amount of years, I don't even have to think about it.  And you know what?  My answer really hasn't changed in the last several years.  I know what I'm doing, where I'm going.  And if you don't, that's fine, but don't act like you do.  Because seriously it just confuses the hell out of people.  Don't say one thing and then do another.  That shit is annoying.

Anyway, went for my run yesterday, got to try out my new shoes.  LOVE them.  I was even able to ass on an additional .1 mile to my laps.  I only did 2 laps yesterday though because I was on a really tight schedule and running out of time.  That really sucked, I wanted to do more.  I am so looking forward to leaving here in a little bit and getting my run on.  I will feel so much better.

I went back to Bergen yesterday to visit my grandad.  He's really not doing so well.  It' really heartbreaking.  He didn't remember me (not that that was surprising), and he was talking but it wasn't making any sense.  I mean he was formulating sentences well, and the words all made sense but we (my cousin and I) would ask him a question and his answer would have nothing to do with what we asked.  I have never had to deal with something like this before.  I mean I have dealt with death and everything, but never with the slow decline of a person.  This is really really tough.

That's about all I have for today.  I want to go get ready for my run, I really need it today.   

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